I had a few major failures in my personal life and work in the last few years. As the result, I found myself in an identity crisis in the past year. I wasn’t sure who Mehdi was, what he was up to, what he aspired to do in his personal life and career, and what he was put on earth to accomplish. I was out of alignment with my wife, kids, family, friends and work. Being 39, I initially tried to brush this off as mid life crisis; but then I decided to deal with it.
Then one night, as I was laying on my bed in early 2018 thinking about the purpose of life, a question came to mind: “How will I feel at my death bed? What regrets will I have?”. This led me down a path of self discovery and deep soul searching for the past seven months, challenging everything I believed in and stood for, trying to make sense of who I am and what I want in life. Later when I read The seven habits of highly effective people I also started thinking about how I want those who know me to feel about me when I’m gone. This journey continues; but I feel reborn and reconnected as I write this.
This is my mission statement, what I stand for and want to accomplish in my life. I am sure I am going to change, fumble and learn as I go; but I’m going to take that journey with this new foundation.
I live a life of contribution, with integrity and empathy, and I take full responsibility for my health, happiness, relationships and career.
When I die, I want to be remembered by family, colleagues and friends as a trustworthy caring person who had a lasting positive impact on their lives and the lives of others.
I centre my life and every decision I make around the following principles:
- Integrity: I honour every promise I make, and I only do and say things I’d not be ashamed of if found out,
- Empathy: I deeply understand others and see the world through their eyes and emotions,
- Courage: I say and do what I feel is right, with immense consideration for the other party, even when it’s risky to do so,
- Curiosity: I acknowledge that I am subjective and I learn constantly,
- Humility: I don’t let my ego control me or hurt others,
- Excellence: I do my very best in everything I commit to,
- Patience: I respond with smile when I can’t control the outcome,
- Emotional Intelligence: I don’t talk or write when emotional,
- Forgiveness: I lend a hand to the fallen, even if they fell while kicking me,
… and I acknowledge and apologise anytime I fail at any of these principles.
The following is the list of my top priorities in life:
- My health
- Benjamin & Jasmine
It is 5th of August 2023 (five years from now):
- Shadi and I are in love, like when we were friends
- Benjamin and Jasmine know who they are and are growing up to live happy successful lives
- I have a great relationship with my family
- I have touched the hearts and changed the lives of many people in a lasting positive way
- I am healthier and happier than when I was 18
- I have spent a lot of time travelling with Shadi and kids
I still don’t know how I will achieve these goals; but I am committed to make them happen.
Personal development practices
Here is a few practices that I’ve been doing to enable me and my mission:
- Spend quality time with Shadi and kids
- Read one book a month
- Exercise five times a week
- Write more
- Call three friends every week
- Watch less than three hours of tv a week
- Get up early
- Take calculated risks
- Foster meaningful relationships
- Cultivate an attitude of gratitude
The following is the list of things that have had the biggest influence in my journey so far:
- Challenged everything I thought was right.
- Observed everything I’ve done and everything and everyone around me.
- Talked with a professional coach.
- Asked for feedback from ex-colleagues.
- Took Via character test.
- Took Gallup personality test.
- Did Happen To Your Career course.
- Listened to a lot episodes from the Coaching for leaders podcast.
- Read a lot of books. The most influential ones were The seven habits of highly effective people, The Big Leap, The power of habit, How to fail at everything and still win big and Good authority.
- Read this guide on writing personal mission statement
To be continued …